China / Beijing

Dining EtiquetteA ~ Z

Introducing the Dining Etiquette (Yin Shi Li Jie)

Eating is a dominant aspect of Chinese culture, and eating out is one of the most common ways to honor guests, socialize, and deepen friendships. Proper etiquette is very important to traditional Chinese people, who feel good manners invite luck, and boorish conduct brings shame. Nowadays, table etiquette is taken as an indication of educational status in China. So no matter whether you are visiting China for a short time or work as an expat, it is useful and important to know some of the basic rules at table.

Earning Some Face

Chinese People don’t expect visitors to be fully versed in proper banquet etiquette, but awareness of a few essentials can earn “face” both for yourself and the host, whatever the occasion. The other guests will appreciate that you have some respect for Chinese culture and traditions.

When attending or hosting a formal meal, note that the guest of honor is usually placed on the seat in the middle, facing the door. The host, traditionally positioned opposite the guest, now more often sits to his or her left. If you come as a guest, be punctual and do not sit down until you are given your seat. The seating arrangements can be very formal and based on ranks. Once seated, do not start on the food or drink before the host gives the signal. Some of the delicacies on offer may test your courage but it is an insult if the food is untouched. Leave some food on the plates; empty bowls imply that the host is too poor and the food is not adequate.

In addition to the above, there are further rules that should be kept in mind. If you are applauded as you come into the room, don’t feel shy about applauding back. Reply to any welcome toast with your own speech and any subsequent conversation avoid broaching sensitive subjects, in particular politics. Show respect to your elders and superiors by ensuring that the rim of your glass is lower than theirs when clinking glasses, and drain your drink in one swift movement.

The Art of Ordering

If you are someone’s guest, you may be asked to order something, or state some sort of preference. If you don’t do so, a ten-course banquet could soon appear. Feel free to name your favorite dish, or point at the pictures on the menu.

A meal might begin with cold starters such as pickled vegetables, seasoned jellyfish, or cold roasted meats. Main courses should be selected for harmony and balance. A typical order would be a variety of different meats and vegetables, cooked in different and complementary ways. The last dish is usually soup, and then comes rice, noodles or bread, without which a Chinese diner may feel they have not eaten. At informal meals you can have rice at the start of the meal, but not at a banquet, otherwise your host will assume his dishes are inadequate.

Invited to Dinner

A formal meal often takes place in a private room and usually begins with a toast. The host serves his guest with choicest morsels, and then everyone is permitted to help themselves. Simply watch others for guidelines on when to use serving utensils, and when, more informally, your own chopsticks will do. In the past, only in restaurants regularly frequented by lots of foreigners, or which also have Western dishes on the menu will knives and forks be available. But nowadays, they are available in most of the medium or high end restaurants. The host almost always orders more dishes than is necessary. While it is, as stated earlier, polite to try everything; it is far from necessary to finish it all.

Dos and Don’ts

The Chinese are fairly relaxed about table manners. Slurping shows appreciation, enables better appreciation of flavor, and sucks in air to prevent burning the mouth. Holding your bowl up to your mouth, to shovel rice in, is another practical solution. You may happily reach across your neighbors, but do not spear food with your chopsticks, and do not stand them upright in a bowl of rice either; as it looks like an offering to the dead. If you have finished with the chopsticks, lay them flat on the table or on a rest. You shouldn’t suck greasy fingers, or use them to pick bones out of your mouth. Spit bones or shells onto the table, into the saucer that was under your bowl, or more delicately into a napkin. Toothpicks are everywhere, but do cover the action with your free hand. Eating alone is alien to the Chinese way of thinking. They believe that eating in a group, sharing both the dishes and the experience would significantly increase the enjoyment.

End of the Meal

A platter of fresh fruit and steaming hot towels imply the end of the meal is coming. In more formal meals, just as you should wait the start of a meal, do not stand up before your host, who will rise and indicate that the dinner has ended and ask if you’ve had enough. The correct answer is “Yes”. The person who invited you usually shoulders the full weight of the bill, so accept graciously. Offering to pay is fine, even polite; insisting too hard suggests that you doubt the host’s ability to pay.

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